The impostor syndrome - every PhD student gets it at some point, or so I’m told. For me, it’s hard to disentangle from my own perfectionism: I’m tempted to think whatever I do is not good enough, regardless of how good I think I am at something compared to other people.

Having one foot in two different fields does not really help.

On the one hand, I feel like I have a pretty good grasp on the machine learning side of things when I talk to Earth Observation people. I’m happy when a researcher at an EO workshop mentions the No Free Lunch theorem, like an easter egg just for me (computer scientist in the house!!! Someone who understands me !!!). The other way round, I have something to share with computer scientists that just start working with EO data. So far, so good. These moments make me feel helpful.

But then there’s also another way round. I don’t fully focus on “one” thing and instead try to smash two fields together: forever playing catch up in both fields. It feels that way, at least. Sometimes it makes me jealous of theoretical scientists that exist peacefully in their ivory tower.

The impostor syndrome gets at its absolute knee-buckling worst when it is time for the big scary meeting with your full supervision team. Senior professor in Computer Science, senior professor in EO, senior professors EVERYWHERE. No word is safe. They will find you out!!

Except, this time, they don’t. You get a virtual shoulder pat for how well you managed the meeting, that warm and fuzzy feeling pops up and you’re proud of yourself.

Maybe you’re not such an impostor after all, I say to myself.

The impostor syndrome - every PhD student gets it at some point. But it’s not all bad. It actually feels pretty amazing when you find the courage to let the feeling of being an impostor go for a moment.

Paint Like a Child - Find joy in stepping out of your field

May 25, 2023

Essays

After years of studying, I have started feeling pretty confident in my machine learning abilities. But my collaboration with SRON brings me face to face with my lack of experience with satellite imagery. Let’s wind back to your student days with me, and dive into the world of the pure joy of learning new things!

Run, Science, Run

May 3, 2023

Essays

First of all: I’m a gym addict. The type of gym that looks like a big garage, has a lot of free weights and free live entertainment in the form of elite athletes (Sportja Leiden, if you’re interested ;) ). When we have to run during a class, that usually raises collective moans.